Terrrrrrrific news people!! MY COM IS DOWN!!!!



*stunned silence*



CONGRATULATIONS!!! AND CELEBRATIONS!!



So no blogging.



If you expect me to apologize for the inconvenience caused, don't. Coz I am dying without a com myself!

There will be a launch party for Singtel's my dreamd8's finalists, and it will be on thursday at a club... Free entry and drinks, IF you make banners for me!!!! Lalala!!!



Send me an email asap if you wanna go.. You don't need to even talk to me if you don't wanna, but if you wanna come pump my hand and say you love my blog, I'm more than happy!! Hahahaha!!



Alright, do send me an email if you wanna go!!

Bản tóm tắt này không có sẵn. Vui lòng nhấp vào đây để xem bài đăng.

So far out of 125 people who read my blog, 16 of them are amoebas and 5 of which are gay amoebas.



WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!

June sent me this via email... Its a picture of a foreign worker....



Just a thought.. Have you realised that there are no fat bangalas?? This goes to show that with hard work and no money to buy good food, there's a thin bangala inside everyone wanting to climb outta those fats.



Alright, now to the picture of the really cute foreign worker:











Ladies and Gentlemen....



















I present to you....















Jian gui le!!!

WELCOME TO THE GUESS SHOW!!!!



WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!! I almost laughed my placenta out.



If you don't know whats so funny, you should watch more taiwan variety shows, baby...



Oh yeah btw. IS MY NEW TEMPLATE FREAKING NICE, OR WHAT?? I luuuuve it!

When I was younger, someone posted this question to me.



She asked, "Wendy, what do you think is the most beautiful thing on Earth?"



At that point of time, I realised that I cannot give her my answer because there are so many different beautiful things, such as the sea, such as the rainbow, etc. I can't make up my mind.



I asked many people this question, and the most common answers are invariably the sea and the sky.



WHY! Blue stuff are ugly. I hate blue.



I asked my mum and she said its diamonds.



One guy gave me a sweet answer: "Women."



June said its herself.



I'm kidding.



But anyway, as I get older, I realised what my answer would be.



It is an orgasm.



An orgasm is so beautiful because of so many reasons. It is the most powerful (or maybe sensational) form of love, it is also mostly rare for women (Bloody selfish men!), and it is one thing that has almost no bad side effects! Most of the time it is free too.



Orgasms fill people with endorphins. Endorphins make people happy.



See, when you are happy, you make everybody around you happier too, except your enemies, but of course seeing your enemies seething that u are happy will makes you happy as well, so you get even happier and ur enemies get angrier and the nice cycle goes on.



When you are happy you laugh alot and suddenly everything seems more beautiful. The world is disease-free! Dolphins are playing, the grass is green on every side, and daffodils are blossoming everywhere! What a wonderful world!



When you are filled with endorphins, people of the opposite sex are attracted to you because of the scent you emit. This is scientifically proven. So when people of the opposite sex are attracted to you, you get praises. Praises make you more confident. When you are confident you can attract more people.



An orgasm also helps you lose some fats. Now thats cool too because you will look better, unless you don't have any fats to minus from, but I don't talk to skinny people so thats their business.



Orgasms are also a form of exercise. Exercise makes you radiant and healthy. Healthy and radiant people get more suiters. Orgasms also prevent cancer and acne. Yeah right. No it doesn't.



But then... you have a truckload of people to choose from, and you pick the best, in which hopefully you can get more (and more and more! and better! longer-lasting!) orgasms from.



The "best" chosen person continues to be attracted, and he also feels that u are terrific because there are so many other people attracted to you so he must be so lucky. He doesn't know its because of him that so many people like you of course.



Lets see on the other hand how things will be without orgasms.



People can smell desperate-ness from a mile away. When u portray yourself to be desperate, you don't get sex. No sex=no orgasms. Then you become more desperate. Then it can be smelt from 2 miles away. Desperation=no sex. Then you get frantic. = no sex. Then you finally die. Life is not worth living.



In conclusion, an orgasm in the most beautiful thing on earth.



You may disagree, but thats your business. You need more orgasms to prove me correct.



Speaking of changing other people's opinion, today I worked with this really smart girl at Tiger Beer called Qingwen. We were speaking of some conflict between me and Bobby (never you mind!) and she gave me this little piece of advice, which I found was really good. She said,

"Bobby is very egoistic. Whenever you disagree with him, its like telling him in the face "YOU ARE WRONG". And whether its wrong or not, is almost always a matter of opinions.



And opinions. There are 1001 opinions everywhere. You have yours and I have mine, and what you do stand to gain to make me change my opinion to become yours? Nothing right? So just leave him as he is, even if you know he is wrong."

I shall learn to do that.



So anyway, back to orgasms.



If only I could bottle and sell orgasms, I would make millions!! How much will an average person pay for a mind-blowing thigh-throbbing spasm-inducing Endorphin Rush? $50? Depends on how long it lasts?



Imagine this! In the future, at the bus stop no one smokes anymore. They all do Wendy's big Os. Wendy's Big Os has no evil side effects while smoking causes lung cancer. Smoking makes your teeth yellow. Wendy's make you look beautiful and attractive.



People mix Wendy's with some other chemicals and it becomes an Orgasm so strong its made illegal. Thats known as drugs. No one takes heroin anymore.



Most unfortunately no one will have sex anymore, but the world is facing doomsday soon isn't it? Or maybe I can sell the Big Os in Small Os form, so people still have sex for the real thing.



Now the problem is how do I manufacture orgasms?



Yawnz. I have got to do my project.



Laters, people.



Meanwhile, I would like to say that I am on a roll. I will tell u all when I'm all prepared. =D



Good day!

Oh no the spoof has been updated!! Please don't read it!! Eddy is EVIL!!! The spoof! Oh it ruins my life! Some people hate me!!!



BTW there are some pretty smart spammers writing on the tagboard, so anything that sounds ridiculous is not by me. I'm keeping the taggie there in case blogger fucks up on me again and thats the only way I can edit the site.



(Oh yeah to those dumbos who still don't get it, the SPOOF IS WRITTEN ENTIRELY BY ME. Yes, gasp all you want. I think its pretty well done. I laugh everytime I read it myself.)